Some men love missionary, and some dudes loves d0ggystyle. Others like their l@dies on top, while few guys stick with sp00ning.
Sure, your favorite s3x position is probably the one that gives you the best org@sm—but on a subconscious level, your go-to move also says something about your personality in the sack.
The Move: Missionary is like S3x 101: It’s the way we’re “taught” to have s3x, and the way that we see it most often in rom-coms and TV shows.
But although this position is a classic, a missionary man might be a little insecure or “need reassurance by seeing his l0ver be responsive,” says s3x therapist Ava Cadell, Ph.D., author of Neurolovology.
You may also be keen on having control during s3x, as missionary gives you all the driving power.
Since the position finds both people face-to-face, there’s some intimacy to it—but its basicness suggests the guy might not be confident about the other moves in his arsenal. “It’s r0mantic, but not very adventurous,” Cadell says.
Switch Things Up: There’s nothing wrong with l0ving the classics, but make sure you take a walk on the wild side every now and then.
“If you can only cl!max during missionary, that’s a problem,” Cadell says, and you’ll need to do some “reprogramming” to your s3x life.
Try switching to woman on t0p, which has all of the same intimate qualities, but will let you relinquish some of that control—and spice things up.
The Move: We’ve never met a guy who didn’t like d0ggy. This, some believe, is how man was meant to have s3x.
A d0ggy-lover “taps into his territorial animalistic instinct as king of the jungle,” says Cadell, “but he also has fears of intimacy and is generally unr0mantic.”
After all, you probably don’t go for rear entry because you want to whisper sweet nothings in her ear from behind.
Switch Things Up: You can get the deepest penetr@tion from this position, but what you earn in depth, you lose in intimacy. To make up for it, spring for sp00ns every now and then.
You’ll still get to enter from behind, but the snuggly qualities of sp00ning s3x will make your partner feel like a dime, rather than a piece of meat.
WOMAN ON T0P
The Move: The beauty of this position is that there are a million ways to do it—and it’s all up to her.
Men who l0ve their women on the saddle are likely concerned with pleasing their partners, and Cadell says this move shows that “he’s confident in being submissive, but he can also be dominant when he enables her to reach her org@sm with deeper penetr@tion.”
Basically, you get off helping her get off.
Switch Things Up: We get that you like the view from down there—who wouldn’t?—but take control every now and again by flipping her over. She’ll appreciate the occasional shift in power, and the view isn’t bad from back there, either.
The Move: Given that sp00ning is most often associated with cuddling and sleep, it’s no surprise that this super intimate position is often the go-to for guys who have a soft spot.
But men who love the move aren’t wimps—instead, they’re “passionate and eager to please their lover,” Cadell says.
Switch Things Up: Everyone likes to experience the sweeter side of s3x, and props for being r0mantic. But you can still be intimate while igniting a little more fire into your s3x life.
While in the sp00ning position, reach around to stimulate her cl!t0ris, or try a position like missionary where you can gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes—while penetr@ting her even deeper.
The Move: Pressed against the front door, hoisted onto the kitchen counter, or in the shower, you can have standing s3x anywhere but the bed.
That’s why guys who like this position best are adventurous, and often turned on by the idea of being n@ughty.
The standing man is a “mischievous lover who gets a thrill out of getting caught, and wants to have as much fun as possible with little regard of the consequences,” says Cadell.
Switch Things Up: Novelty is part of what keeps your s3x life hot, so don’t let yours simmer down by going to the same standing position time after time.
Vary up the locations you choose, or switch to d0ggy from time to time—you can have your partner standing and bending over a table—to keep things interesting.